4 Tips for Surviving if you are an Empathic Person

I recently did a Clifton Strength Finder and, not surprisingly for myself, being empathic was one of my strengths. 

Now this really bugged me in some ways!!  In the past, being empathic is something I had come to consider a weakness rather than a strength as I wasn't handling it very well.  However I am a work in progress and always learning to embrace its wonderful wisdom!!!!    

When you are empathic by nature, you are empathic.   It is not, in my opinion and from my own experience something you can switch on and off.  Rather it is something to learn to work with. 

If you are not careful being an empathic person can often turn into being a people pleaser, where you say YES to someone but may end up allowing yourself be burnt again and not knowing why!    

Until of course you find the gem in the strength and allow it to be your illuminator.   It takes practice but worth it to learn to allow your empathic nature illuminate your way. 

1. Creating personal boundaries     

Boundaries are of paramount importance to the empathic person.   Strong boundaries for personal care and allowing only what you want to allow in, in.    We are all different and this is for ourselves to decide and to work with.  

Our core drivers and our core essence is driving us so finding out what resonates with our core drivers is a good place to start.    If you are following someone else's path then you will likely end up falling off and, you may struggle to find your own path again. 

2.    How are you feeling after an encounter with someone?

A question to ask yourself when you feel like your energy is being drained, or you are being taken for ride (again) or whatever can be "How does this person make me feel?"  

AND I mean really feel.   Not what they are saying as such, but more the feelings of perhaps manipulation - How are you left feeling after your conversations?

Our feelings are our guiding lights in the night sky when you may feel you are walking through the dark.    Stop and take note of how you are feeling after conversations with people.   

Is there anything they are saying that feels off?    Is it all lip service or is there depth in it?  Are you left feeling drained?

3.  Learn to follow your gut.  

That internal beacon that sends out signals like "You are doing it again, pull back, pull back". 

But of course if you have become so unused to following your gut or heeding its' wisdom then you may also have lost the ability to even notice the signal. 

Working on becoming more in tune with your gut is essential!  

4.  Becoming assertive has helped me greatly.  

When you learn to be able to express your needs in a truthful way in a relationship, be it business or personal that you congruent and in alignment.  

Becoming assertive and taking back control of your emotional state and listening to your gut are all essential ingredients.  You can build your boundaries and make decisions which are best for you.    It's not a selfish act, although for some around you it may ruffle feathers as you stand more in your power and state your needs. 

It is an act of almost self hate (bit strong maybe!) against our self if we continue to allow others dictate our path and follow along just to keep the equilibrium and not rock the boat.

Stand up, stay strong and listen to your gut instinct, it will never send you astray ... believe me I know!!!

Until next time, keep the faith,

Dolores Andrew-Gavin, Assertiveness Coach, Energy Therapist, Soul Care Practitioner, Author and Mum 

My web site is being worked on at the moment but check out my Facebook page in the meantime.