Why We Don’t All Get Along & 4 Ways To Survive!
Quite simply because we ARE all different!
So here's a scenario and it's based upon what someone might say to another "Don't Take Things So Personally".
Karen and Joanne have become friends because they share a common interest.
Karen, with her Artemis Goddess/archetype qualities, is an independent character with a tendency to be emotionally distant at times. This is just the way she is, she concentrates so hard on herself and her own life that she doesn't always think about the feelings of others.
Joanne on the other hand, has more vulnerable Goddess/archetype qualities and can feel victimised quite easily. When this emotional distance comes up between these two friends Joanne with her vulnerable archetype may take it personally, feel upset and let down because of what she perceives as Karen's distance.
What are the Lessons?
We can all get triggered by everyday stories and events when they hold an emotional charge for us and remind us of a previous story, one which we might not even remember happening. Joanne in this scenario has an old story which is being triggered by Karen's distance. When she feels the distance in their relationship it brings up past traumas when she may have felt others did the same and may have let her down. Whatever emotion is attached to her old stories will come into this one in the present moment.
This will remain the same for her unless she decides to change the charge in these types of stories.
On the other hand the Artemis archetype being totally unaware of the effect she is having just carries on being herself un-knowingly causing her friend upset.
In fact if she did find out she might tell Joanne to "Not Take Things So Personally". Red rag to a bull for poor Joanne until she gets rid of her old story!
So what can we do?
1 Working on our stories and realising why we get triggered brings awareness. Journaling is a great start and will bring us freedom from our victimhood. Trying a tool like EFT canhelp us take the charge from our stories.
2 Communication is vital in relationships. If Joanne remains passive aggressive and not assertive, her friend will not be aware there is even an issue.
3 Be willing to change. If Joanne does pluck up the courage to speak to her Artemis archetype friend Karen, Karen then has a choice. She can either listen to her friend and appreciate that this is a quality that is part of her make up. She may feel it is something she may wish to have more control over so as not to upset people or, on the other hand she may go into her more destructive quality of cutting Joanne off, not accepting she has had anything to do with the situation. In this case Karen has taken it personally and has not owned her own personality traits.
Joanne will have worked on her story too, having taken the first step to talk to her friend and maybe tell her friend she knows she is sensitive and is working on it!
4 Learn compassion and empathy. This does not mean we have to take on the troubles of others it just means we appreciate that we are not all the same. Learning not to judge others so quickly without knowing them is growth for our own personalities.
We always have choices and, our choices always have consequences.
If you would like to study more about Goddess archetypes keep an eye on my web site for more details. We can gain a great insight into why people may be the way they are when we learn from the great Goddesses and begin to learn to "Not Take Things So Personally" !
Until next time .... keep the faith,
Dolores Andrew-Gavin, Author, Empowering and Assertive Coach, Energy Worker and Owner of Irishhealthhour.